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Choosing the right words

The language we use matters. Not just in terms of getting things grammatically correct (though that is important too) but in terms of the image we create in the listener’s or reader’s mind. Selin Kesebir of London Business School has done some really interesting research about the way that even the order in which we habitually use gendered words (e.g. businessman and businesswoman vs. businesswoman and businessman) strongly affects how we think about situations. To read more, go to http://bit.ly/2E8M0kv

When I run workshops in telephone skills (yes, not everyone knows how to use the phone effectively!), I often give the women in my class advice I was given at the start of my career: Don’t ever say ‘It’s Judith calling’. Always say: It’s Judith Perle calling’. Judith is a secretary; Judith Perle is someone to be reckoned with. Creating the right impression can sometimes be as simple as using your full name, not just your first name.

Presentation skills in a nutshell

A gem I picked up recently – almost short enough to be a tweet!

When making a presentation, bear three things in mind:

1. Simplify complicated ideas
2. Emphasize the benefits
3. Try to influence your audience to take action

The power of gestures

Attitude is all-important. If you approach things with a positive frame of mind, there’s nearly always a useful ‘takeaway’ to be found.

An example: Yesterday I went to a ‘free’ seminar on presentation skills which was, as I suspected, mainly a selling exercise. Since I run workshops and masterclasses for a living, I’m always curious to see what others offer. And there was one gem – a short exercise to demonstrate the power of body language.

Try it and see. First, find a partner. Stand facing each other, and clasp your hands behind your back. Now think of a subject that you are really enthusiastic about – and tell your partner about it, but without using any gestures, and keeping your voice as monotonous as you can. Try to convey your passion purely through the words you use.

Not easy, is it? A succinct example of how important body language is in communication. While I don’t believe the often quoted mantra that 97% of your impact is the result of body language (what you have to say matters at least as much as how you say it) – I do believe that body language is much under-rated by almost all of us.

Do you agree?

Randomised coffee trials (aka, “having a coffee and a chat with a relative stranger”)

When it comes to innovation, most of us under-estimate the power of serendipity and the importance of meeting new people.

In workshops, I always stress the many and varied benefits that building a network brings. So I often talk about the importance of serendipity, and of meeting new people – and it is heartening to find that the news is spreading. At a recent workshop which I ran for the Wellcome Trust, I mentioned the (strangely named, I think) Random Coffee Trials that are becoming increasingly popular in organisations as diverse as the Scottish government, the Red Cross – even the UK Treasury.

The idea is simple. People sign up to the programme, and are then randomly partnered with another participant, with whom they arrange to meet informally over a cup of coffee. There is no set agenda – some people talk shop, others have more personal conversations. But the end result is that silos are broken down, ideas exchanged, help and advice given, and relationships forged. Organisations such as Ashridge Executive Education claim that over 90% of those taking part have met someone they would not otherwise have met in the course of their work at Ashridge.

One of the participants in my workshop pointed me in the direction of an interesting piece in Network, the magazine of the Medical Research Council. By creating a pleasant environment where staff are encouraged to relax and chat over a drink (rather than drinking inferior coffee from a dispenser in splendid isolation), many at the MRC’s Laboratory of Molecular Biology (LMB) in Cambridge claim that this has made an important contribution to the 13 Nobel prizes won by scientists working at the institution.

A nice example was provided by Professor Alessi who described how informal discussions led him and a colleague to realise they were, quite literally, working on two sides of the same coin – and that each of them had the answers to the other’s questions. The outcome is a potential new cancer drug.

If you’d like more information, or advice on how to organise RCTs in your organisation, do get in touch.

Gathering: Lessons in professional networking from Finland

Just back from a stimulating weekend in Finland, presenting at the Hanken School of Economics Summer Summit (www.hanken.fi/en). I am always especially pleased to work in Finland. I have personal connections with the country (my mum was Finnish) and have been spending my summer holidays there since I was a small child. But it was more recently, when my ideas on approaches to professional networking were developing, that my Finnish connection came to the fore professionally.

Much (most) of Finland is wild forest. Roaming in that forest is an enormously peaceful occupation…..and it was while gathering bilberries (or it may have been mushrooms) that I realised that there is something liberating and very productive about having no goal or aim. Gathering frees one from the pressure which any ‘hunting’ activity inevitably brings with it… and that, in turn, led me to realise that most people equate networking with hunting. They need something (a job, an introduction, a piece of information) and they go looking for it. The emphasis is entirely on me and my needs.

In contrast, the gatherer (in networking terms) goes out into the world to meet people, and is relaxed enough to wait and see where the conversation leads. The emphasis is on both ‘me’ and ‘you’. Sometimes the encounter is boring, sometimes it is interesting (but still ends up in a dead end) and just occasionally it is interesting and it leads somewhere. By taking the ‘gathering approach’, the pressure button is turned off – and networking is seen as a pleasant activity in itself, which is not necessarily self-seeking or manipulative.

Try it and see for yourself. I have many stores about the benefits of chance conversations, but I’m always happy to hear new ones.

And finally, please don’t think that I’m against ‘hunting’ Without doubt, it has its uses. It just isn’t the be-all and end-all of professional networking.

Musical Chairs

Another one of those chance conversations that lead somewhere unexpected… I’ve been a volunteer reader on our local Talking Newspaper for a couple of years. Never got involved in the committee, governance or management side of things, just did the read, put the USB sticks in envelopes and went home. A few weeks back, during our ‘cake break’ in recording, I happened to be chatting to our engineer and regaling him with the latest instalment about dealing with what are euphemistically called ‘strong characters’ in my role as Chair of another voluntary organisation. I didn’t think any more about it until a couple of weeks later when that same engineer (who I hadn’t realised also happened to be Chair of the Talking Newspaper) called to say “I’m stepping down as Chair to spend more time travelling- would you be prepared to take over?”

Having agreed with my wife that I wasn’t going to take on any additional voluntary work, I defended my ‘volte face’ on the basis that this wasn’t an additional commitment, just an extension of an existing one with a commitment of ‘only’ four board meetings a year. So this week, after being nominated at the AGM, the Hexham Courant reports that ‘Talking Newspaper Has New Chief’.

But the point is this. I didn’t actively pursue the role, and I only took it on because the charity was hard-pushed to find someone else to take on that responsibility. I was approached to do it because of an entirely chance conversation in which I had given enough information about myself and my experience to allow a third party to decide that I had the skills required to do the job.I hadn’t been ‘selling’ or promoting myself, just having a chat and swapping stories over a piece of home made cake.

The Network Effect reaches #7 in the Economists’ Bookshop weekly chart

I’m used to running workshops for relatively small groups, and I’ve also delivered masterclasses to all sorts of audiences, both large and small. But there’s something distinctive about a book event – and when that book is your own, the event becomes even more special.

It may have something to do with having spent the early part of my career in the world of publishing, or the fact that I’ve taken part in the same literature class for more years that I care to admit…

Whatever the reason, I was strangely moved when speaking to an audience at The Economists’ Bookshop (at the London School of Economics and, I believe, the only branch of Waterstone’s to retain its original name). The audience wasn’t huge, but they were all book lovers, and many of them were students. The venue wasn’t specially impressive but it was a bookshop. And to see our book (with my name on it, as co-author together with my colleague Tony Newton) ranked 7 in that week’s sales charts represented a validation of all that we have been striving to achieve – changing attitudes to networking and helping people connect with each other in these difficult times.

Now all we have to do is persuade the 300-odd other branches of Waterstone’s to (a) stock the book so that browsers have a chance of coming across it and (b) run a signing event! Any suggestions will be gratefully received!

It pays to ask

One of the things we bang on about in both networking and negotiation workshops is the need to get real information to help avoid bad decision making based on faulty data.

And I’ve just had a reminder of that lesson.

I’m at St Pancras station, ticking off the last few destinations for the ‘book on train’ project. As I stop for a coffee at well known franchise, it occurs to me that leaving one or two books on tables there might encourage finders to whisk them off to exotic locations.

I could easily just plonk a couple of books on tables and make my exit, but wanting to ensure that staff won’t just bin the book with other table waste, I think it prudent to try to get the manager ‘on board’.

The manager listens attentively to my explanation of the project, and seems genuinely interested, but says she is unable to help. The reason, it seems, is an edict from Head Office which dictates that all tables must be cleared of all contents between customers: no exceptions. So while the books might not end up in the waste bin, they would instead be collected up and stored in the crew room as ‘lost property’ (and doubling as reading material for any member of staff keen to improve their networking skills…)

Digging a bit further into the Head Office edict, I discover from the helpful manager that the same applies to all branches. Given that I’d previously been toying with the idea of ‘seeding’ books at other branches of the same chain, the fact that I’ve bothered to engage her in conversation about my project ends up saving me wasted time and effort, plus of course the value of the books themselves.

But there is, of course, the counter-argument which goes like this: “It is better to seek forgiveness than to ask permission.” In this case, it has very definitely paid to ask.

FIND OUT MORE

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A guide to making – and keeping – the connections that make your, our and everyone else’s world go round.

The book walks you through everything you need to know about connecting with other people.

Judith and Tony’s goal in the book is to get away from the manipulative ‘working a room’ concept of networking. Instead, they use the results of research into human interactions coupled with real case studies to justify the hints, tips and suggestions they propose.

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